So many opportunities lost

I think the worst thing a parent can do is play favoritism among their children. Believe me, I know how much it hurts to watch as the other child gets all of the attention. I try so hard as a mother to keep everything fair among my two kids because I would never want either of my kids to feel like he/she is not good enough or needs to earn my love. As an adult I know that can really hurt because that is how I felt my whole life. I have always felt like when it came to my parents I was just not good enough. No matter how well I did in school or how many responsibilities I took on at home and in school, I was just never going to be good enough. I watch now as my parents dedicate a great deal of their time to my nephews and very little to my kids. It hurts to watch, but it is not much different than how I was brought up. Of course, I have mentioned this to my parents and get the same old, "We treat all of our kids and grandkids the same all of the time," which is a complete lie. Granted my sister does invite them on many excursions while I have stopped inviting them since they usually said no to me when I did invite them. A person can only be rejected so many times before they give up.
For years my sister, her husband and their kids had season tickets to the Phillies with my parents. When my sister decided not to do it anymore I offered to buy her half of the tickets so that my kids could have the same experience. I called a few times to see how much I owed and my mother had bought all of the season tickets instead of allowing my husband, kids and I to enjoy the same quality time they did for all of those years. I was really hurt, but when I told them that I was the crazy one and somehow must have made it all up in my head. My husband and I were disappointed and saddened by their lack of respect for us.
My oldest is now starting to ask why my parents do not love her as much as my nephews and sadly I do not know what to tell her. All I can say is, "Honey, it is me and not you that they do not love." I am thankful that their lack of attention for her has not put a wedge in the relationship she has with my nephews. She knows it is not their fault that my parents favor them over her or my son. At the same time, how sad for a child to feel unloved by their own parents or grandparents.
Over the years I have become uninvolved with family things because I never feel welcome even when I am there. I feel as though I am the mistake they got stuck with instead of the child they were blessed with to raise. I hope my children never feel this way about their upbringing. I work so hard every day to make each child feel special! I hope I am successful in doing so!